Grandparents want to know what they can do to try and work their way through their ‘living bereavement’.

I believe that we have to focus on all the good things in our lives, those family and friends who love and care for us. To be grateful for all we have.

From a practical point of view, you can of course set up a memory box, you can write a blog, write letters, write a journal. We all have different ways of expressing our love.

In the last 10 years I have written poems, I had never written a poem before, well not for pleasure!

Writing down your most innermost thoughts is very therapeutic.

Don’t get hung up on grammar or spelling, just write down.

Here is jut one of mine!

Turning a negative into a positive.

Those early days, of hurt and bewilderment,

The spiralling towards such darkness and despair,

The pain that seared through me like a red hot poker,

The day when I heard I would not see her again.

For months I felt I couldn’t go on, couldn’t face life without her,

The torment of a son who had been wrenched from his daughter,

I am a Mum who protects her children to the bitter end,

There was no way to protect, just to sit and observe a child’s pain.

One day, I awoke from this living bereavement,

Enough of my self pity, enough of anger, enough of wasting my life,

Life is never perfect, it is a blessing,

Things happen that cause so much agony, time to change.

A time to reach out, a time to turn things around.

From a tiny seed of an idea grew a tree of Hope,

Roots spreading wide, a stability in an uncertain time.

A place for sharing, caring and supporting,

Grandparents united in their sorrow, holding out their hands,

They steady the sinking ship, they look forward and never back,

Negativity is poisonous, it eats away at you at your very being,

It will trap you, curb your wings and drag you under.

We are all better than that, we are all unique, we all have a place,

Time to make a difference, to allow us time to live our lives,

Life is short, something’s we can not change,

We can change where we go from here, that is in our hands,

Enjoying every breath we breathe, soaking up the sun,

Embracing all that is good in out lives,

Being thankful for the friends we have made along this path,

Friends whom we would never have met, but for our common loss.

After dark there is always light.


©Jane Jackson(Rights reserved April 2015)


Come on have a go, get your creative juices flowing.