At this time of year I do a mail shot to grandparents whom I may not have heard from for a while and to remind them that if they would like me to put their message to their grandchildren on our ‘Tree of Hope’ to email me.

One of the most wonderful things is the emails that ping into my inbox telling me that they are now reunited with their grandchildren.

This year is no exception, I have heard from several grandparents who are building bridges with their families.

In every case it is where grandparents have decided to leave the past where it belongs, behind them, there is no discussion of blame or accusations.They make it clear that it is the present and future that is important, above all they think their own thoughts but never speak them.

We all know that it is very difficult to look for positives when all we think we can see are negatives, but if we continue going down that road there can never be reconciliations.

It is a bit like saying, “What a beautiful day,” only to have the response, ” It’s going to rain later.”

Of course it is not as easy as that, but it is a good starting point.

We have to look up not constantly look down.

There is good news out there, and at this time of the year it is even more poignant.