The role of being a grandparent.

Anyone who has had the privilege of being a grandparent will know how special it is.

Being able to give the most precious thing of all, time, freely is something you can’t always do as a parent.

As a parent you are busy, probably juggling jobs, home, family and sometimes time is something that eludes you.

We may be grandparents but we were parents first, and know only too well the pressures involved in family life, of course things have changed and sometimes its hard to pull ourselves into a different time. To accept that times do change, parenting changes and the way we did things are very often poles apart from the here and now.

Some grandparents are quick to say, our way was the best way, but was it?

The role of being a grandparent isn’t easy, and it needs constant work, just as it does as a parent.

I was reading some comments on a forum yesterday that showed how difficult it can be and the responses were interesting shall we say!

A grandparent was explaining that she didn’t see a great deal of her grandchild, and that it was totally unacceptable, as she had a right to see him.

I won’t go into whether as a grandparent you have a ‘right’ to see your grandchildren, as I have written so many times before on the subject.

The post continued, saying things like, ” I have told my DIL that she is doing it all wrong, that she must do it this way,” and it goes on in that tone.

She has been told that she will no longer see her grandchild if she carries on this way.

The writing is clearly on the wall, and the consequences are obvious.

A grandparent in my opinion, is there to offer support if its needed and you are asked.

We have to allow our children to bring up their children the way they want to, we may not necessarily agree but it is not up to us to say so.

Every single parent on this earth, makes mistakes, but they need to make mistakes to learn from them, as we all did.

I for one still make mistakes on a regular basis.

My boys were lucky enough to live with my Mum, their Gran, for many years, and not once did she ever interfere, never said anything about my parenting skills, or lack of them! But I knew she was always there and I only had to ask and she would say something wise.

To any grandparent who is blessed in having a relationship with your grandchildren, just be there, just enjoy every magic moment, never judge and allow parents to be parents and do it their way.

Remember it can change in the blink of an eye.

Jane

 

 

 

 

 

About Jane

Jane setup Bristol Grandparent Support Group in 2007 after a string of incidents led to the loss of contact with her Grand Daughter.

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