Surrogate grandparents.

It is very difficult for us who are apart from our grandchildren to understand how anyone would not want to be a grandparent, but there are many who don’t.

I often have emails or phone calls from parents who are desperate for their children to have a ‘grandparent’ in their lives. Sadly their own parents have made the decision to not be involved at all with their grandchildren.

My own father was one of them.

Many parents want to set up some form of group to link people up, with the best intentions in the world.

Sadly, we have to be realistic, there are hurdles to overcome, not least the question of child protection.

It would be very unwise to allow a perfect stranger to form a relationship with the children, safeguards would have to be in place.

Of course people can be checked,with the  Disclosure and Barring Service (DBS) previously known as CRB checks but even that is not foolproof.

Historically we know that it is not 100% safe.

It is so sad that we have to even think this way, but we do.

One way that people can get involved with families who are needing support is by joining organisations like Home-Start, grandparents I know, have found this a great way to meet families. They go on to having a wonderful relationship with all members of those families.

One young man that I met recently, has got to know one of BGSGs grandparents and he absolutely loves her, she is invited to his school when they are focussing on grandparents, she gets invited to his swimming competitions and she is there shouting for him loudly at every opportunity. It makes no difference to him that she is not actually a blood relative, she is just his ‘granny.’

I hope there is a way of taking this forward.

Here a some links to surrogate grandparents sites for those interested:






About Jane

Jane setup Bristol Grandparent Support Group in 2007 after a string of incidents led to the loss of contact with her Grand Daughter.

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