More than I can handle?

People  often say, “God will never give you more than you can handle,” but is that true? ( In truth it is a misinterpretation of a biblical verse.)

Sometimes it seems to be one thing after another, heavy boulders that just keep falling down on us, just as we begin to think we are climbing up, here comes another one, crushing us.

Many grandparents say they can’t face anymore sadness, that they feel like giving up, that life is just too difficult, and I absolutely know what they mean.

They find it impossible when they hear things like, ‘you need to move on,’ or ‘let it go.’

Or as said to me recently, ‘Jane, you are a strong women, you can cope.’

Sometimes, I too can’t cope and I’m not strong.

Things happen to us along life’s journey that leave us feeling bruised and battered.

When we pass people on the street, we have no idea what emotions they are feeling, but they are putting one foot in front of the other, they are still breathing in and out and continuing on what, may well be a very difficult time. But still they trudge on.

Perhaps we can learn from the child within ourselves.

Whatever age we are, we can still recall how it felt to be young, full of expectation but living every moment. Not thinking about tomorrow but embracing today and all that it offers. Meeting friends, going somewhere new, having adventures.

When we were young we had little fear of the unknown, as most of our experiences where unknown. We just tried things out.

As we get older and some might say wiser, (that is another debate), we seem to lose the ability to be free. To be able to face life without fear and trepidation, the ability to take things at face value, we always look for the negatives, of all the things that could go wrong.

I suppose the, glass half empty, syndrome.

We have become burdened with all those boulders, weighed down by problems, sadness and grief. We feel tired and weary, with it all.

And we are afraid, afraid of what else is coming, afraid of what the future holds, afraid that we will not see our precious people again, afraid of our own mortality.

Fear is not a sign of weakness, it is an anxiety caused by an anticipation of something, we need to acknowledge it and above all we need to share our fear, to ask for help when we need it, and to gain strength from others.

I read this quote today, “Life is a hard teacher, it sends the test first and the lesson later.” Which takes me right back to the first sentence in this blog.

When the heavy boulders start to fall, we feel a physical and mental shock, we need space and time to work out our own personal strategy of dealing with them. We can then begin to work out the best way for us to start pushing those boulders to one side and to begin the hard climb back up.

There will be times of slipping and losing our footing but we can triumph and reach the summit, our cuts and bruises a reminder of how strong we can be, even at times when we feel hopeless.

It is the strength and the lessons learnt after the test that endures and makes us who we are.








About Jane

Jane setup Bristol Grandparent Support Group in 2007 after a string of incidents led to the loss of contact with her Grand Daughter.

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