Children are just children, whoever their parents are.

Many of us will have followed  Madonna and her ex’s very public battle over their son, and where he should be allowed to live. At fifteen I would have thought that his wishes should have been listened to, the need to drag it out in court for months is ridiculous. Madonna may well be a public figure but both of them should have put their son first, not used him in their conflict.

This story has been spread over all media platforms, everyone having an opinion.

It has only hit the headlines because it is a celebrity, played out for the press ect, what about the ‘ordinary’ families that are going through the same thing every single day, in our Family Courts?

The reality is that there are hundreds of thousands of children suffering this situation, being made to choose a parent. No child should have to choose.

Whether it is a celebrity or not, the damage to the children is exactly the same, the way we live is often learnt behaviour, what are the children of 2016 learning?

That it is ok as a parent to fight over children, that you can use them as a bargaining chip, that having children is not a responsibility but a right. That children have to grow up fast, to become support for their parents if things go wrong, parents become children’s responsibilty?


This generation of children are growing up with uncertainty, instability and loss.

Loss of their  innocent childhood.

It becomes full of adult conflict, friction and stress, the dark place of raised voices, a place where they are pulled and tugged in all different directions,it is impossible for them to please everyone.

All they want is for the loud noises of confusion to stop and for someone to scoop them up and hug them.

A parents arms should be a safe place for our children, a place they run when they are scared and sad.

Time to open our arms to all our children, put aside our differences and to just be Mum and Dad.




About Jane

Jane setup Bristol Grandparent Support Group in 2007 after a string of incidents led to the loss of contact with her Grand Daughter.

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