Reading a story today reminded me of a similar thing that happened when I was working with children.
In schools children do projects about all sorts of topics and one of them is likely to be family orientated.
Days of note are of course Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and more recently Grandparents Day.
So what happens to the children whose parents are separated and the children who don’t have a relationship with their grandparents?
It is so painful to observe children struggling when being asked to write about a family member who they don’t see.
I have known some children who will make up a fictitious person, so that they don’t have to appear to be different.
On one occasion the children had been asked to look for photographs of their grandparents at home, and one little girl came up to me and said that when she asked her Mum for a photo, she was told there weren’t any, because she didn’t like them very much and that they were bad people. When the little girl asked more questions she was shouted at and told that sometimes when people grow up they decide they don’t want to see their mums and dads anymore.
This little girl started to cry and said, ‘when I have my children will they say I am a bad person and not see me anymore?’
How would you have answered that?
For those who make the decision to keep grandchildren apart from their grandparents, this is the sort of damage you are inflicting, not only for the present day but for the future of your own grandchildren.
In the story I read today, the child saw a photograph and asked who the people were in it, and was told a similar thing as above, this child also believed that the same would happen when she grew up.
What are perpetrators of this doing?