I wrote an article some time ago on, “Why join a support group.” It was as a result of a grandparent saying to me, “I don’t want to join a group that will make me feel worse than I do now, a group that pushes me down a black spiral.”

I was food for thought.

It is of course very difficult to try and get grandparents who are going through the isolation and loneliness of being apart from their precious grandchildren, to remain any where near positive.

However, it is essential.

It is essential for them as individuals that they keep remembering the good things in their lives, other family members, friends and the memories they hold. I think we all know that it is very easy to give up hope, to see nothing to be joyful about, but there is always something we can focus on to get us through those really dark moments.

Above all else to look up into the sky not down to the ground.

I suspect that if you just take a minute to reflect on everything around you, you will be surprised at what you see.

Grandparents often continue this sort of conversation with, ” Oh yes I know but……..” It is that ,but, that is the hurdle we have to jump over.

I have said before, if we don’t what is the alternative?

Every day waking up not noticing if the sun is out or if it’s raining, days when we are so enveloped in our own grief that we pass people by without even noticing their existence. Those people who we don’t see may well be in a very dark place themselves.

Our time here on this amazing planet is such a very brief moment in time, we have to grab it all with both hands, to appreciate what we have and be thankful that we live where we do.

I know the whole system is wrong, that children are not being listened to, children are not having a loving and caring relationship with both parents and wider family, and we can and I certainly do, take every opportunity to make people listen to continue to raise public awareness of the issues of denied contact,but I also know that smiling at someone in the street, whom I don’t know, chatting to strangers at a bus stop, giving my elderly neighbours a hand if they need one, helps me to rise above the hurt and desolation, I am not going to let others drag me down to a level I don’t want to reach.

So, if you are part of a support group of any sort, just ask yourself that question, ” Is it making me feel worse than I do already, am I supporting others in the group in a positive way?”

Acting together in a caring, non judgemental way we will get through this.