The anguish and pain that grandparents face when they are estranged from their grandchildren, is impossible to explain, it can only be fully understood by those who have experienced it.

Not an experience I would ever wish on anyone else.

There are many who give us advice, tell us how we should deal with it, but we are the only ‘experts,’ a degree or any professional status doesn’t make people an expert in grandparent estrangement and grandparent alienation.

It is one of the reasons why, when grandparents seek out a counsellor more often than not they will say that they have no experience in this form of separation.

In the last 10 years I think I have all forms of ‘advice’ given to me, from move on, let it go, to pull yourself together,or the best one, you must have done something wrong!

Each and every one of us has to find our own way of facing this situation, and it will be different for everyone.

No amount of articles, books, research will find the answers.

I like the phrase ‘let it be,’ it allows me to accept everything I am feeling, to enable me to allow it to be part of me, and just let it be.

Somehow it gives me peace.

I can’t change it, but I can change how I deal with it and how I look forward and not back.

Only I can make those changes.

Jane