When you find yourself estranged from someone, you can often find yourself thinking of all sorts of ways in which you might be able to get a glimpse of them, in many cases families live miles apart but some are just a short distance away.

Everyone reacts to these situations in different ways, there is no one size fits all, reaction.

Some grandparents want to be as far away as possible as they worry about bumping into family members in the high street, others find themselves watching the clock as they know what time the grandchildren come out of school, which is just over the road.

I completely understand.

What I do find totally mystifying is when it is the other way round.

So when the family members who have instigated the separations, who have used such vile rhetoric towards them apparently spend every waking hour trying to find them, on social media networks, so Face Book, Twitter, forums and all manner of internet services.

Why?

If I don’t like someone, I have nothing to do with them, I certainly don’t want to know what they had for breakfast or who their friends are.

What is actually going on here then?

Are they concerned about what might be being said about them, do they want to try and cause even more hurt to those they were once close to, and have now destroyed or is it  back to power and control?

Family members who set themselves up as fictitious people thinking they won’t get recognised, how sad is that. I just don’t get it.

Before the days of social media, of course it was impossible to ‘keep tabs’ on people, we were able to live out our lives, without being afraid of looking at our emails, looking at our personal account pages, reading forums that we take part in, and yes, people are frightened. Afraid of what a family member is writing about us, afraid of lies and accusations, afraid of trial by social media.

There are many people who need to look to themselves, to just think about how they are tearing their own families apart, we may not get on but it is no-ones right to keep children away from those they love, just because they are trying to score points.

Children never forget.

All of these children will have children themselves one day and I hope that those who behave in such a devious way, never have to experience their own,’Big brother’ watching them.

Jane