I have ┬ámet all sorts of people over my life time, and don’t think I truly understand what makes people work.

In the last 10 years I have of course meet people that, had I not lost contact with my grandchild I would never have met, and I value each and every one of them.

What I have learnt is that suddenly there are all these ‘experts’ ready to pounce.

I don’t know if they hide around corners just waiting for a vulnerable person to pass by.

Everywhere you look, someone is telling you why you are estranged from a family member, only too happy to send copious articles of confirmation that our family members must be suffering from, whatever the latest buzz word happens to be.

It is true that when you find yourself faced with this situation, you do research and read lots of stuff on the subject, but in my lowly opinion it does far more harm than good.

As an example, when you are feeling as though life is not worth living, that you can’t get out of bed in the morning, the very last thing you need is for someone to send you yet more, in my view, destructive information.

It is a real worry to me, that those who are feeling so desperate could feel worse, if that is possible, by reading all of this stuff. It is as though the ‘experts’ are seeking out their prey.

The fact is that we are apart from a family member, knowing that it could be possible that there is a label for this sort of behaviour, is not going to change the situation.

Often these ‘experts’ or those who have suddenly become imaginary ‘Masters of Phycology ‘ in their own heads, have either a hidden agenda or the biggest egos ever. It could be they have books to sell, websites to promote, or just want self gratification.

In most cases, they are very clever in making us think that they are there to help us, so just a word of caution.

Do I sound cynical? That’s because I am.

If it helps you find some answers, then that’s great, but don’t get dragged into the whirlpool pedestal building.

One thing about a pedestal is there is only one way down!

Jane.